Philemon Brima Kamara
Stories (2/0)
I SPEAK WIFE
I saw a bunch of young guys who just got married were walking in, and I could see that on their dumb face, believe me. He has no idea what he just got himself into. He doesn't even know how to speak Wife. Oh, you've got to learn to speak Wife, man. And wife is a language that you learn over years of abuse. You get you start to figure it out after a while, you know. “Wife” always comes in the form of a question, you know? Oh, yeah, I'll be sitting on the couch comfortably and here comes the wife. Hey, are you thinking about going to the store? To you, young married man, that means you're going to the store. Don't be a dumb ass and answer. No, I wasn't thinking about going to the store. No, she just told you to go to the store. Now, when you get to the store, you wait. You wait for her to text you all the things that she wants. And it's also by brand. Oh, my wife has to have a certain brand. I can't even make a decision for myself in the grocery store aisle. If I'm in the toilet paper aisle and her brand's not there, I'm the dumb ass that has to FaceTime her. Hey, babe, is that one good? Can I get that one? All the other married men are like, what she says? What she says? And by the way, don't leave when you've bought everything. Don't leave because you're going to get another text. It's going to say, Are you still at the store?
By Philemon Brima Kamara4 months ago in Marriage
Navigating the Comedy of Chaos: A Tale of Lockdowns, Homeschooling, and Kidney Dramas.
I'm genuinely excited, and you know why? The COVID numbers are going back up. Initially, I was nervous, fearing another lockdown. I can't handle that again. I'm married with two kids… Remember how positive we all were at the beginning of the pandemic? Like, maybe this is God's way of saying we need to be around the people we love…. I felt that way for about two hours, and then I was like, "I got to get out of here. I'll take my chances with COVID. It's a lot, man.
By Philemon Brima Kamara4 months ago in Families