Anik Marchand
Bio
Anik Marchand moved from New Brunswick to Southern Ontario at a young age, lived some crazy moments in Montréal, and is now based in Madrid, Spain.
E-mail: [email protected]
Stories (30/0)
The day I lost my soul to the devil
The evening began with excitement as my cousin came to pick me up from my grandfather's cottage. I had been staying with him for a few weeks during my summer holidays from school. I remember wearing jean shorts and a striped t-shirt and being happy that I would get to see my cousin and hang out.
By Anik Marchandabout a year ago in Psyche
I have CPTSD.
Complexe Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, now that's a mouthful, isn't it? I didn't know this mental illness existed until I was diagnosed with it a few months ago. CPTSD is described as a condition where you experience symptoms of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder but, with some complexity. You can't control your emotions, you get very angry and feel distrustful towards the world, you constantly feel empty and hopeless, you feel like no one can understand you or you avoid friendships and relationships because you find them too difficult to upkeep. Maybe I should add this to my Tinder profile haha! I sound like a catch...
By Anik Marchandabout a year ago in Psyche
Will your vision board cure me?
Ever wanted to kill yourself? Ever wondered what it would be like on the other side? Is it freeing? Does the pain go away? Do the obsessive thoughts go away? Are you happy or do you feel nothing? Is it all a black hole? Do you float around in nothingness? Are you in water? Is ther music there and food? How does it all work? Is it cold? Do you have a house?
By Anik Marchand2 years ago in Psyche
5 Things I Discovered When I Moved to Madrid.
1. People pee everywhere. When I first moved to Madrid a few years ago, I moved to a neighbourhood in the centre of the city called Lavapies. It looked cool during the day, people out everywhere walking, going to work, walking their dogs. It seemed really great, vibrant and fun. However, after some time of walking to and from work, I realized that I always smelled the scent of pee everywhere I went. Embarrassingly enough, I somehow thought it was me? Did I pee myself and not know? That’s absolutely ridiculous…Of course I didn’t. Then, as months went on, I realized that it smells like pee everywhere because people here clearly have no shame in peeing anywhere. They will pee on the sidewalk in broad daylight! WTF! I was stunned. The worst is when people go out to clubs and they get drunk and need to pee, they will literally squat next to a parked car and pee. I once was driving near Tribunal metro and say a girl’s whole bum as she squatted down next to car tire to pee…I mean…yeah…not classy.
By Anik Marchand3 years ago in Wander
The Day I Decided to Get Dreadlocks.
From the moment I could grab things, I would grab my moms nylons and throw them on my head and pretend I had long braids. I would twist them and make little nylon buns on top of my head and, the worst part of all of this (haha!), is that my mom would encourage me. She would help put the buns up and tie them and let me prance around our house. From there, I would beg my parents to let me have long hair and stop giving me bowl cuts and put weird 90s butterfly clips in my hair.
By Anik Marchand3 years ago in Blush
Wasted Potential
Maybe I didn’t get the cool art job I wanted in a museum and maybe I’m not with the hottest, richest man and yeah, maybe I could lose a few pounds and perhaps put some nicer makeup on and look more girly and maybe I could stop getting tattoos and maybe my stretched ears are too much for some to handle and maybe, just maybe I could stop comparing myself to all the fake lives posted on Facebook and Instagram with the fake smiles and fake poses and fake bodies photoshopped and set up photo shoots that make you look desperate for attention and likes.
By Anik Marchand5 years ago in Psyche
Hendrix
I started liking heavy metal when I was eight-years-old. This was my mother's friends fault. My mother had two good friends, Maria and Kerri-Ann. Maria and Kerri-Ann were the most amazing and coolest couple you can know as an 8 years old. I mean, I loved them. I used to spend weekends over at their house watching horror films and eating all the best snacks. They used to show me a kind of love and affection that no one outside of my family had shown me. It was like I was one of theirs. It was a great feeling to know you were that loved and cared for. This was especially important to me because I had just moved to a new province and I was away from everything that was familiar to me. Thus, their protective nature over me was comforting as well as their love for me. They really had taken me into their family as their own and it felt great.
By Anik Marchand5 years ago in Beat
Yvette
There will be a moment in your life when you will feel what it’s like to live without someone. And, I’m not talking about living without an ex-boyfriend/girlfriend. I’m talking about actually having to live without someone because they passed away. There will be a moment when you sit down all alone in your living room and think of what that person would be doing right now and it’s going to hurt. It won't hurt as much as it did the day they left, but you’re going to see and feel that empty hole in your chest. You’re going to be painfully aware of this cavity that cannot, and will not, ever be filled. It seems as though this hole in your chest is encased with precious museum quality glass and allows everyone to see right through you…
By Anik Marchand5 years ago in Families
I Bought Doc Martens, Again
I guess this was expected. Moving to another country, knowing no one, being alone and lonely. But, I never thought it would feel like this. You know, when I lived in Montreal I was a bit lonely but that was self-inflicted, I didn't want to go out much but, here, in Madrid, I do want to go out and live but, making friends has been my biggest challenge as of yet. I just don't fit in with these people...
By Anik Marchand5 years ago in Wander
Simon Says, Break Down
We’re always worried about money, today was no different. We were on our way to Portugal from Spain. We had all our luggage with us for our usual bi-weekly vacation back to his hometown. After 40 minutes in the hot metro, we finally got out. So, here we are, carrying three bags and one suitcase for our 15 minutes walk on the car and finally, were there! Yah, thank god. I haven’t eaten anything since the night before and I’m hungry, I’m tired and I just want to sit in the car and play on the new tablet he just bought me.
By Anik Marchand6 years ago in Wander
Traveling Blues
I guess I never will want to admit this to myself. This incurable unhappiness stuck so deep inside me. This cemented, anchored, armoured heaviness in the core of my being which refuses to leave. This feeling of never being satisfied. Eating, but having a hole in your stomach. Running, but not moving. Breathing, but fucking suffocating.
By Anik Marchand6 years ago in Humans