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Young Motherhood

What Having a Baby Young Is Really Like

There's so much others have to say about people who have a baby early. Some support those mothers while others shun them. There's so many aspects to this that it's hard to draw a clear conclusion. A big part is how it started. Was it on purpose? Do they have jobs or a house? Are they mature? Have they finished school? All of these questions come into play as for how one should react.

First I would like to remind you you all to take a deep breath. Someone is now a parent. No matter your age, you all got the same feelings when that test says positive: You're scared, happy, worried, and bouncing from one thought to another. Every new parent needs a guiding hand, and even though all the older parents might feel like screaming about how stupid it is, that young parent-to-be needs all the more of a helping hand. After all, that baby still needs to be taken care of and loved. If you're really upset, ask to talk later and take some time to cool off. Get your thoughts together and figure out what needs to be said.

To the parents who have a teen about to be a new parent, remember that times are changing. Sex Ed isn't what it used to be. Make sure they know about OB appointments and what to expect. Teach them about the things to avoid during pregnancy and what might happen. After all, not everyone knows about morning sickness until their favorite meal doesn't stay down! Other things you might want to talk to your children with is what they expect. Many times as parents we forget what they think is the biggest part. Teens especially will defy you the more you push against them. Sometimes we need to just sit back and allow them to direct the conversation. Not all parents have the same concerns, and they might have questions or concerns that you won't yet think of. Pushing too hard could discourage them from asking again. Our biggest job as parents is to guide our children, so when they become parents we need to teach them to guide. Their only experience is what we allow them to have so allowing them to take charge is the first step. Another thing to do is to start preparing them for the real world situations that you face on a daily basis. Allow them to join when you pay bills, do taxes, and budget your shopping. Eventually, allow them to do it for you. Having them schedule their own appointments and calculate the costs for the new addition is a great way to teach them the time that is soon to be taken away. Have them make a list of everything they will need and how old the baby will be when it reaches its milestones. If they leave something out, tell them. Every month, do it again until they've got it all down. Many people don't know the basic things about babies until they face the consequences.

Finally, to the young parents themselves, you guys are about to brave a hard road: Tears and smiles at the ultrasounds, an exhausted mother-to-be preparing for the battle of birth, and a father not knowing what he's in for. My biggest advice to you is remember what family is because when those hardest days hit, you'll need each other. Money is a big cause of stress. Get jobs early and save every penny you can. To mom, the father will need you. You'll be tired and sore for a while but the extra effort is worth it. Get snacks and a movie ready when he's in the shower, tell him you appreciate him, and understand he will need some time to himself occasionally. To the father, your spouse needs you. Many jobs won't hire someone pregnant so you might be the only one working. Remember she is hurting and will appreciate that back rub. She's also going to be hormonal, so expect those moods swings and soothe her fears. It's hard for both of you and that needs to be remembered.

Let's support each other as parents, and not by age. We all do wrong, but we all need a helping hand.

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Young Motherhood
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