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Who comes first to you? Is it your wife? Is it your mother? Maybe your kids? Where does your baby mama fit in? Who is the one that you turn to in your time of need? Who do you count on when you're upset? Who is the one who can calm you down when you are angry? Who is the one that is above all your number one before anyone else?
Who should come first to a man? If you ask a lot of husbands, they would say their wives. Ninety-eight percent of the guys asked said their wives while only two percent said their mothers. Of the guys asked that chose their mothers, when asked who comes first your kids or your mother, two percent said their kids. Of the ninety-eight that said their wives, when asked between their kids and their wives, sixty-four percent said their wives and thirty-four percent said their kids. Most of the guys that said their wives gave the answer, "You have to have a strong marriage to have strong kids." "If you want a biblical marriage like Jesus wanted, you have to be the man and take care of your wife and kids. Your family comes first mother later," said one man studying to be a minister. Another man said, "I have sons and I want them to see that wife comes first, kids are next and anyone else is after them. However, if it is something medical or specific need they need to have met right away, my wife knows I will take care of them first and she respects that."
When you have sons, you definitely have to make sure he knows how to treat a woman. It is on the Dad to show the man how to become a man, how to treat his wife, how to respect her, love, and support her. He needs to show him how to honor his wife. When you have a daughter you have to show her the kind of man she deserves, the kind of man that will treat her right. Not the type of man that will easily break her heart or mistreat her. You have to show all of your kids what a strong marriage looks like. What a happy husband and wife look like.
Does a baby mama ever register on the list unless it is something that involves the child? In most cases that would fall under the kid's box instead of the baby mama box anyway.
The wife first or kids first is a little trickier. In a lot of cases, kids should definitely come first especially if they are a young age because they can not fend for themselves. If it is medical or if it is something important, of course kids should come before the other spouse. However, that is not always the case. And in these other instances, I believe it is more important to put the spouse first.
As a dad, if you are only worried about the kids or only talking about the kids, your wife might start to feel like more of a roommate than a wife. She may start to feel that you are only still together because of the kids. And feel that without them you have no relationship. If this happens, a weekly date night is definitely needed.
As for the mother, she can and should be an important part of your life, but the Bible says to leave and leave for a reason. You are one with your new wife and you are to make a family with her. You are to be one body, one mind, one spirit. You are meant to go through life together not apart and as a low priority to the other.