When Parents Honestly Don't Know Best

In today’s world, one of the most damaging things parents can do is neglecting their child's well-being. Especially when it comes to mental health issues and any other type of medical issue. It's almost along the same lines as the over opinionated “soccer mom” or “hockey dad”, but when forcing your child to suffer from not getting the proper medical or psychological support it's a lot more damaging for the child.

Just because someone is a parent, honestly doesn't make them an expert on every aspect of their children. Let's be honest, how many of us have heard parents say things such as.

• I don't believe that doctors have my child's best interest
• My child does not need medication, what they need is a good smack
• Praying is the best medicine
• The only thing drugs do is keep doctors rich
• There's no way my child is going to get autism from a vaccine
• And so on

My personal experience comes from having parents who refused to let me take medication for ADHD. Instead told me things such as "ADHD are just excuses for being lazy and stupid. Why don't you actually make an effort, instead of making excuses."

Then I spent a summer at my aunt's, who basically forced my parents to let me go to a doctor and I got diagnosed and was prescribed Ritalin twice a day. My parents wouldn't even see my point of view or my aunt's, to quote my own mother the only thing my aunt did for me was make me a worthless drug addict. I ended up discontinuing my relationship with my family a few years ago, because of this.

Basically, what being a good parent involves is a lot more in today’s world than just doing the basics for your child. Being a good parent also has to do with doing what is beneficial for you child. Regardless of your own opinions and beliefs, regarding medical, therapeutic, and pharmaceutical treatment and issues. The reason this is so unhealthy for your child is pretty straightforward, but sadly most people side more on the pseudo science side than on the science side.

Why is this so bad? Think about it, because what you are doing is reinforcing your child that there's nothing wrong with them. In doing that, their self-image goes down the drain because they think that they are the bad person for contradicting their parents. When in fact, it's actually bad parenting. There's also the developmental side, by not giving your child the proper tools and resources, in order for them to have a healthy well balanced life. You are doing absolutely nothing, other than taking away from your child reaching their full potential.

Then there's the psychological aspect, like I have stated in my previous articles. When you do not deal with psychological issues, not only does the original issue get worse, but due to not treating the main problem it. The person gets other psychological problems and makes treating something, that much more complex. Considering the fact, that if the parent let the child get help in the first place, their child would have had the resources and tools to help them lead a normal balanced life.

When parents make excuses for not letting their children by saying things such as “I'm the child's mother, no doctor can tell me what is good for my child.” All they are doing by making excuses, instead of getting proper medical, therapeutic, or pharmaceutical treatment for their children is making excuses for their serious lack of understanding and education regarding this issue, and avoiding taking ownership of what they are doing, causing short term and long term damage to their children.

In conclusion: When dealing with parents and other family members like this, remember that you are not the bad person for looking after your health. Also depending on your age, when your parents refuse to let you get the proper medical or psychological support, due to their own personal opinions. My advice is to contact your local social services or explain to your doctor, even proactively make an effort to get a doctor that can’t be influenced by your family. Also be persistent if you have a medical problem, whether it’s psychological or medical get to your doctor and explain it, don't let your well-being be dictated by stereotypes and uneducated overbearing opinions. Doing what's best for your child sometimes means saying, "I don't know."

Sometimes supporting your child to reach their full potential and not punishing them for a valid medical diagnosis but instead supporting them is the best thing you can do for them.