What Changes When You Become a Mama?

What changes when you become a mama?

Here is a fun post created for mamas to read, relate to, and possibly crack a smile or laugh thinking “that is so, so true.” You may be able to relate to a few of them or all of them! Six changes you encounter when becoming a mother are listed. Also, this piece can be informational for women who are considering having kids or expectant mothers! It gets you ready for what is to come and encourages you in knowing that you are not alone. You can think back to this article once your little human enters the world and remember that “this is normal.” I think the biggest lie we believe as mothers, women, and humans is that we are The Lone Ranger, struggling with a specific thing. What crap! I’m here to share a real, raw perspective on the life changes of becoming a mama. I try to keep my thoughts and page unfiltered and true. Here ya go!

(These changes are in no specific order.)

1. We learn to live on “tired mode.”

Okay ladies, this is NOT a negative thing. I repeat, this is not negative. As an avid lover of sleep I used to view this aspect of being a mama as; well, frankly terrible. I was the girl who wouldn’t wake up easily or at all throughout the night. I wouldn’t wake up to pee or even flinch when a wild thunderstorm rolled in. But now, I wake up when my son's breathing is heavy from across the hall! But you know what, none of this is a bad thing and I’ll tell you why. One, it is a maternal instinct that kicks in. Being a light sleeper is a safe thing for your children. Also, we don’t simply live on “tired mode.” We live WELL on tired mode. We can still have a full, joyful life while being a little sleepy. Be proud of those “mama bags” under your eyes! I believe there is a grace over our lives as mothers to live WELL while tired. Don’t think of it as a sacrifice to living an abundant life, rather think of it as a gift to be able to thrive amidst some weariness.

2. Doing your makeup is not an easy task.

When I say not easy, I mean really, really hard. As your kids age, I am sure this lessens some! But under one-year-old, watch out! My little guy is nine months and will NOT let me sit on the floor in front of the mirror and apply my makeup. He wants EVERYTHING I have. If I’m holding the mascara, he wants it. If I’m applying foundation, he wants it. Whatever I’m using at the moment he lunges for. So mamas, we learn to move quickly right?

3. You are emotional, about everything.

I'm going to guess there is some pretty specific science behind this, but birth changes you. Physically, psychologically, emotionally. I think that when we become a mama our capacity to love is extended and expanded. It is a beautiful thing, a scary thing, and it changes your life. We are able to sympathize with our children and love and hurt like never before. We also cry in Disney classics, heartfelt commercials, and watching our kids sleep. And yes, we cry for absolutely no reasons sometimes too, and that happens to be absolutely okay.

4. Showering is our favorite hobby, not a daily need.

Okay okay, this can sound gross—so let me explain. I still try to shower every day, (let’s be real) sometimes every other day. But, it has a different meaning and weight now than as it did before having my son. Time is so precious. At my son's stage in life, I cannot simply shower whenever I want. My usual shower time is now evenings when my husband is spending time with Adiah (our son). It is so special because I don’t have to worry about TIME. Since my husband is with Adiah, I get to take my time as I shower. That is the golden phrase! TAKE MY TIME. It is one situation throughout the day that isn’t dictated by my son, and I take full advantage of it. Of course, it’s also great to get all the “YUCK” off of me from who knows what that occurred throughout the day. Can you relate?

5. Half-finished tasks are a part of daily life.

I don’t know what personality type you were before kids, but it doesn’t matter in this case! Whether you were the tidiest, most neat, structured woman or more of the “do it on the fly” and “I’ll get to it at some point today” woman, we can relate. Mamas unite! We all have half-finished tasks we are striving towards completion for! Also, note that I say half-finished and not unfinished. It just sounds better! It means we are actively working towards a goal, not simply staring at untouched projects, chores, or tasks. These tasks are half-finished for good reason too! Whether your child has a cold and needs extra hugs that day or naps aren’t going as planned, our “to-do lists” get interrupted often. If you had every single task finished and accounted for all day every day, I may actually ask you “At the cost of what?” Are you living to DO, or living to BE? You are who and what your child needs when they need it. Let’s take pride in giving them our all. The tasks can wait, but maybe their fragile heart cannot.

6. Our bodies look different.

You guys may think I look exactly the same as before birth, but that is the furthest thing from true! While for some blessed women this is a reality, for the vast majority of us it is not. Our body changes to carry a child, and is never fully the same after each birth. Being a twenty-two-year old mama and not confident to wear a bikini had me somewhat devastated. I wanted to be young and “flawless” still and my stretch marks were not a part of my perfect picture. But you know what is perfect? The healthy glow on my son's face and his unashamed laughter. Please, please, please do this next exercise! Take a moment and stand in front of a mirror in your home completely naked. Yes I said it, NAKED. Don’t zoom in on every mark, or do. But take a deep breath in and don’t be in a rush to look away. Have your beautiful children in mind, reflect on the miracle of a masterpiece that brought life into the world—for some mama's time and time again. Look at yourself as a whole being, not just a body. AND SMILE! Be in awe of who you are and what your body looks like. Those curves, marks, and scars have redefined you, and that is perfect.