Keli Williams
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True Confessions of a Housewife (The BAD Stuff) @#$%

What every wife wants to say but doesn't.

Hi, yes I'm a married woman for 10 years with two beautiful children and a (for the most part) great husband. But damn it on some days I feel like jumping in the car and driving in the opposite direction and starting a new life as Amanda Habernickel. People always talk about the joys of marriage and family but rarely talk about the times when you just don't feel like doing the $%&*. 

This is for the women who work from home or stay at home and take care of the kids. It's a lot of work consistently every day and when your husband wants demands like sex twice a day the answer I want to say is, "Get the hell off of me." It's not because I don't want him it's because I barely showered due to being up since 6 am cleaning and cooking breakfast for the kids. Vacuuming and running the home business and I'm tired too. For some reason, he thinks that since I work from home that I have enough time or desire to ride his baloney pony off into the sunset. NO, I DON'T.  

Let's discuss me time. Oh, what's that? "Something non-existent or extinct like the dinosaurs."  Everybody needs some me time EVERY DAY. It's not selfish but I found when you don't get it drives you crazy. It makes no sense that the only free time I get is when I use the bathroom. That's really not true because someone is talking to me from the the other side of the door. All I hear is "Mom where is my sock?"..."Babe have you seen my glasses?" or the greatest, "Mom (I just passed Dad downstairs and walked up a flight of stairs to ask you to fix me a sandwich) I'm hungry." Point is the $*@% can get daunting. Not to mention mommy club for the children.

The judgment from other "housewives" in the mommy meet clubs are just as bad. "Johnny scored a perfect 5 on his end of grade testing, what a genius...(then looks at you snotty) what did Timothy score? Knowing damn well Timothy scored a 2.5 because he has a short attention span. You know that because I've opened up to you about it like an idiot trying to get pointers. In the meantime, everyone is all ears to hear how your child is inadequate. You respond while gritting your teeth "he passed." Changing the subject. I'm so sick of those heffas. They get on my last nerves but I don't think I have to worry about them anymore. After months of meetings with these hags I finally snapped and told Sara that she looked like her mom delivered her a** backwards after she kept referencing my clothes as "thrifty." Not a good way because I'm a girl who loves to thrift shop. But, in a way, I just shopped at the Banana Republic and I look better than you. So I now have to find another summer playgroup for my kids. Oh well....

Does this mess happen every day? No. Some days I look at my kids and say dang I finally did something right. Then others I say... I wonder if the hospital switched my children by accident. But if you're a husband reading this, give your wife a break. She is just trying to make it through the day too. If she yells from the rooftops most of the time it has nothing to do with you but just a bad day. To all the housewives keep doing great. Remember your greatness shines even when you think you're failing.

Sincerely, K.W.

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True Confessions of a Housewife (The BAD Stuff) @#$%
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