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Traveling Teenagers

Whether it is a family trip or a solo trip, here's some perspective.

By Lisa SollmanPublished 5 years ago 5 min read
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I was a teacher's aide and I went to the zoo with kindergartners and 3rd graders and they each had a different perspective. The 5 year olds saw it as new and exciting because after all, animals are interesting and fun as far as they know. The 8 year olds wanted to learn all about the animals, they read the signs and showed concern about the environment and how it effects the animals. They also were aware of the risks associated with working with wild animals. I bring this up because a few short years change perspectives.

When my boys were 11 and 12 and we spent spring break at the Oregon coast, it was fun and new and because of that, I was choosing what we do and where we go. Last summer at the beach (the boys are 16 and 18 now), I asked for their input and we negotiated. We went to Astoria, we went shopping at outlet stores, then to Yachats and up to the lighthouse. The Oregon Coast Aquarium and Ripley's Believe it or Not was not on our agenda this year. It is because of perspective.

I sent my older son to Peru for 3 weeks with a group. He learned about perspective. He learned that he is capable of taking care of himself, and that the things we worry about in the United States seems arbitrary compared to the struggles of a small village in the Andes. Meanwhile, my younger son is not mature enough or interested in such things. So my point is this—try to look at these learning experiences through the eyes of the people you are trying to teach.

If I had expected my 3rd graders to act like kindergartners or my older son to act like my younger one, then they would miss out on a unique experience. The picture above is of my older son looking out at the Grand Canyon last year. This was a family trip that was spectacular. The boys and I couldn't afford to travel much when they were very young—I think we got to the coast 2 or 3 times. I spoil them and traveling seemed to be a beneficial way to spoil them while learning and experiencing and getting new perspectives.

So I thought I would talk about several aspects of traveling teens. First, the group my son traveled with had many rules and guidelines that I discussed with my teen and made sure he understood. Even if you are going on a family trip, I suggest you go over some rules and guidelines to help get everyone on the same page. Everything from staying with the group to time to be alone or with other kids, they are not toddlers that need their hand held, but they need to answer your calls and meet you at the room at the given time for safety reasons. I check on my younger son more often than the older one because the younger one has had behavior issues and I really did not know if he would behave on our trips. I know my son and what he needs, and I know he needs to make some choices and have time to explore and learn without me.

Next I would encourage you to include your teens in the planning phase of the trip. Let them go over the list of things to pack and make sure they get it all packed. Let them look up sights to see at the destination and make suggestions for how to spend your time. Ask them if they want to go on a guided tour or helicopter ride. If they are included in the process, they may be more confident in planning their experiences when they are on their own. This is difficult if you have a teen that wants to do everything and demands that they can't just pick a couple of things. But they have to learn to deal with disappointment, so I have been told, so go for it (my boys chose where we ate but not much of anything else).

Lastly, be aware that you all are not going to be happy every minute of every day that you are on your trip. And make sure the kiddos know this as well. I mean I have IBS and my younger son has anxiety/ tummy troubles and stress will bring it on faster than you can say "Are we there yet?" It is difficult to plan around this but not impossible. Don't make your schedule too demanding and these little set backs won't even matter. I mean when the boys were little we would make collages, and besides the collage where my son took multiple pictures of the emergency exits and made that the theme of his poster, we don't even notice the extra hours we were in the hotel feeling yucky, because we focus on having fun. Don't worry if the kids have to bring their tablets and phones for those boring times, I think trying to say it has to be all or nothing is not only extreme, but insane, because it does not work (most of the time). If they are busy online, then you don't have to worry about them doing something risky and you can relax and have fun.

Now this may be different than your experience, because my boys are not your run of the mill teenagers! My older one has above average intelligence and is sensitive and nerdy and the younger one has ADHD and is compassionate and was aptly nicknamed "the brat" when he was about 2 years old. I am a single parent, and have been since my younger son was 9 months old or so. I have a great family that has helped with childcare, financial help, and just having someone to talk to when I was overwhelmed. But I found a way to travel with my teens and send them on solo trips also, and these are the things I found when I did that. And I will keep learning more in the next couple of years that we go out into this world and explore and learn and change our perspective.

Thanks for reading, and look for more of my opinions on kids, parenting, traveling, and other thoughts.

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About the Creator

Lisa Sollman

Single Mother with 2 teenage boys. Caregiver, tax preparer and taxi driver (to the boys). Explorer, Reader and Educator at times. Probably some other stuff also, but this is meant to be a short description, so I will stop here.

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