These Lies That Bind

My eyes blinked open; I knew it was the middle of the night by the black blanket that covers the sky. It’s sprinkled with diamonds, they mimic stars. Disrupted sleep occurs due to these sheets for walls. Drunken giggles echo through the space between me and the horny couple in the other room.

“Oh, Henry,” A female voice cooed.

“You like that?” My dad asked, sounding too curious for my liking. That wasn’t Mom’s voice.

I shove myself out of bed, and yank open my bedroom door, just to take another three steps to the beat of theirs. Bang, Bang, Bang! I hear hushes being exchanged. Shuffling feet scurried to the door. The knob turned; appearing fully clothed, my dad opens the door. He's dressed but there’s sweat beading on his skin and his room seemed to be vacant. However, I knew it wasn’t.

“Where is she?” I ask with the taste of disgust in my mouth.

“Your moms not here sweet—"

I cut him off.

“Not Mom, you dumbass, whatever slut you were just talking to.”

“That was the T.V., Kerry, why would I have an affair? Your mother and I have been together since high school. I would never do that to her,” he says, as if I was about to believe him.

I push past him and go straight to the bathroom. She’s hiding somewhere, I think to myself. The bathroom was empty, I peek under the bed, nothing. I know she’s in here. I didn’t just wake up to the damn T.V.

“There isn’t anyone else here, you should go back to sleep. I think you’re getting paranoid,” I hear my Dad say. I ignore him.

I look around the room and see the closet. I breathe out and walk around to the closet. I grab the handle of the door and I pull it open.

I was prepared for an affair, but not this. This just didn’t compute in my brain. Am I really starting to see things?

The mystery woman I was so hell-bent on exposing isn’t a woman at all. Or mysterious, for that matter. It’s Shelby, my Mom’s 17 year old niece; my cousin.

Bile flipped in my stomach and began to rise up my throat as I darted to the bathroom to find release in the toilet. How? Why? Was this the first time? So many questions swarm my head, my knees felt weak. I’m sad, angry, absolutely mind fucked. What do I to do with this? How could I be the bearer of bad news to this capacity? I have no clue what to do or how to focus on one emotion.

“Kerry, I’m so sorry, I never meant for you to find out. I just snuck in here while your dad was sleeping, this is completely my fault and you shouldn’t be mad at Henry.” The words pour from Shelby’s mouth as if she could say something to make this better, and why the fuck is she still calling him Henry?

“Get the fuck out of my house.” I spit the words out as if they were acid on my tongue.

“Kerry, I, I’m sor–" Fuck no, she’s not trying to speak again.

“I SAID GET OUT!” I could only see red now, the color of adrenaline and rage.

She scrambles for her things and nearly teleports herself out the front door. Just as she should. Now I need to deal with my father.

“You fucking piece of shit. You have ruined everything,” I say, hate dripping from my words.

“Oh honey, no, you can’t tell your mother. This was just a one-time mistake, please, give me a chance to fix things,” he pleads his best case.

“Hold on. First, you will never be able to fix this—ever. Second, I will not be the one that shreds the last bit of what’s left of this family. Neither will you. You forget this happened and make it to where Shelby becomes a cousin who only sends postcards. If I see her, I swear you will lose everything.” Saying these words with every ounce of sincerity I had, I wait for his response.

He just nods his head with fear in his eyes.

“Good. Now what’s for dinner? You should make mom’s favorite, pot roast, right?”