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The Sh*t They Don't Tell You: Lesson #3

Lessons about the Trials, Tribulations, and the Downright Disgusting Parts of Parenthood That They Don't Tell You About!

By Tiffany WadePublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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Welcome to Temper Tantrums.

"No!"

One word. Two letters. May or may not include an exclamation point. But any way you decide to phrase it, that one syllable word can ruin someone's day. And by someone, I mean a toddler. Welcome to temper tantrums, you poor unsuspecting fool.

Before birthing Z, I had a seriously bad case of MKW syndrome. Symptoms include snarky looks when encountering the kid thrashing himself all over the grocery storm floor in a fit of rage, turning your nose up at blowouts, vomit, snot, and the thought of getting peed on, and most prevalent, snide remarks starting with the phrase "My kid won't..." (Sometimes, when people have a real stick up their ass, it's "My kid won't EVER...") (Side note: I'm ashamed to admit I've been one of those people... with the stick real far up my ass.)

I distinctly remember several occasions during my time before becoming a parent (and especially during my first pregnancy) where I whispered to whoever was lucky enough to be accompanying me that day "Oh my gosh, my kid will NEVER act like that" upon witnessing a total meltdown, possibly verging on conniption, from a little human in a public location. Furthermore, I couldn't believe my eyes when this little human's big was just standing there, with a dumbfounded look on his or her face, NOT EVEN YELLING OR SPANKING THAT CHILD. "Oh my gosh, Karen, who the hell does that? He's not even disciplining his daughter for acting like that. How embarrassing!" (Shit, I don't even know a Karen.)

My point in all this is, my kids have acted like that. And, though I don't care to admit it, I have been that parent, trying not to lose their cool in public, not knowing how the hell to handle such behavior from someone I'M supposed to be responsible for. If I spank them, I'm abusive. If I yell, I'm emotionally damaging. If I don't do anything at all, I don't care. In this day and age, it seems no matter what we do, us parents can't win. The only way you will never experience a temper tantrum is if you never say no. If you never take any object away from their dirt-covered little hands. If you never attempt to get them in the bath against their own will. If you only feed them the correct food every meal even though they seem to choose what they like to eat by playing eenie-meanie-miney-mo... you get it. (Shit, even looking at them the wrong way can solicit a level 9 toddler storm.)

Lesson #3: It's okay if your child (or children) break down in public. What's not okay is not dealing with it.

However you deal with it, make sure you deal with it. If you need to get a little firm when you say their name for the thirteenth time to get their attention, do it. If you need to leave a cart full of groceries, bounce out to the car and try again tomorrow, do it. Even if you need to be in denial for thirty seconds while you collect yourself, so that you don't lose your cool, do it. But make sure that you talk to your little. Correct their behavior, and move on.

My husband and I have our own ways of dealing with such behavior, and it varies from situation to situation. Sometimes, all our temper tantruming toddler needs is a split second of our undivided attention to satisfy their insatiable thirst for dispersing loud, obnoxious banshee screams throughout the restaurant. Other times, we are not so lucky and have to improvise. (Your skill set in parenting should include creativity, quick thinking, comebacks that a three year old can understand and the ability to NOT gag when they hand you their booger-mud pie. YUM.)

At the end of the each day, whether you dealt with a million temper tantrums, or none at all (Ha.) make sure to remind yourself that you did your best. Make sure to hug them tight, and remind yourself why you wake up every morning. And then prepare yourself for the rounds you'll go tomorrow!

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About the Creator

Tiffany Wade

I'm just me. Tiffany. Mom of Z, B and SC.

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