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What happened that night? On the sixth of this month? I inhaled twice and dropped my body weight onto the mattress. As I sank and closed my eyes, I heard my name. I heard a desperate call yelping through. I twitched and jumped put of bed, banging on my annoying wooden floor. Annoying because everyone downstairs can hear the thumping of my feet as I leaped towards my sister’s room. The run seemed like a marathon. Why was she calling my name? The door was locked. I heard my sister groaning as if they had severed her leg and she was witnessing the gushes of blood squirt out. I desperately tugged the door back and forth. It was locked. I exclaimed, “Lyny thie door is locked! You locked it!” No reply. Just uncomfortable and disturbing yelps for help. The groans came in intervals. I heard her for two seconds, then she paused. The pauses were eternal and I on the other border was helpless. I could not see what was happening inside that dark room. Feeling the thrashing pounding against my chest, I lost consciousness and realized there was no escapism.
Next my mom rushed upstairs. I knew this was not going to be pleasant. The last time my mom noticed my sister convulsing, she turned pale as fainted. I held her inside my arms and I knew this time was going to have a similar distaste. I yelled at her to look for a key. I squirmed around in left to right looking for a solution. I screamed for help and thought about kicking the door open. The universe understood my thoughts and up came my stepdad, Steve in his blue boxers, awakened from deep sleep into the pit of chaos. My sister still groaned for help. He could not remember where he left the key. I was drowning in a sea of desperation. I could no stand the madness. The blurriness. The look on my mom’s face, the nervousness in my stepdads. “Kick the door!” I exclaimed! The hatch broke off and my mom rushed in and flipped the light switch on. My sister was found crouched on the floor, with blackened pupils, grinding her teeth. I ran back to my room and felt my hands shaking, my chest pounding, and my knees weakening. My blood turned cold. The agonizing desperation of that door traumatized me that night. How the simple reality of the door being locked could have killed her? Without her conocimineto to the light, she would have turned into a vegetable in that dark room. I heard my named and I smelled the trauma, the fear. I slept with her that night, and stayed close. Why does she experience this? So many what ifs and whys. That may never get answered.
I was not holding her but I was next to her, absorbing her energy. I love her, I repeat that in my mind as I am close to her. The next day, she only remembered calling my name. Nothing more and nothing less. But me? What about me? I am going to remember this for the rest of my existence here on Earth. That feeling of desperation tugged at every ounce of electrical energy inside my body. Left me mentally, emotionally, and physically fatigued. Hold your loved ones near, tell them you love them even if its in the thin air within your own head. Let out the energy onto the universe, even if its stays in your personal universe, your mental domain. In my head, the words I love you play anthem for my family. I love and for them a thousand times over, like they say. I will never forget the experience, the desperation, the agony. Hold them and touch their flesh. We are made of the same properties, same chemicals, same biological reactions. We are of the same energy, same cosmic waves. Hold them near. And whatever you do... stay close. For her, a thousand times over.