Raising Tiny Humans Is Exhausting

Let me just start by saying "Whoever said ALL moms are superheroes!" lied. For those that say that they "Would love to be a stay at home mom," please stop, just STOP! Before I met my husband 4 years ago, I was already a mommy of two kids trying to be the best mom I could be. I worked my butt off to give my kids everything they needed and wanted. When I met my husband, one thing he always said to me was that he wanted me to "spend more time with the kids." At the time I seriously thought it was the best idea to come to mind. But, oh boy was I wrong!

A year passed and we finally started to discuss having more kids.Time went by, and by LIFE circumstances, we decided we should wait a while. For some reason, I think a couple of months went by when we finally decided that now was the perfect time. When I am telling you that I went to hell and back with this pregnancy, I mean, IT was hard as hell! I don't think we actually went to a OBGYN until maybe around 18 weeks. By the second doctor's visit we got to find out we were having a girl. OK, here is where I am gonna be as honest as I can be. I wasn't too excited about having a girl for the simple fact that I personally feel like boys are a lot easier than girls. It's really funny because it was like as soon as we found out what we were having, the nausea and all the symptoms that come with a pregnancy popped out of nowhere. My type of nausea and sickness was worse than the normal, I got diagnosed with Hyperemesis Gravidarum (a severe type of nausea and vomiting during pregnancy.) Boy oh boy was this hard on me! I couldn't eat anything without throwing it up, including water. Throughout the whole pregnancy there were many different emotions. There were days were I just wished that all of it would come to an end. Then there were days where I looked at all the positives. But, as most moms do, I doubted being a mom AGAIN. See one thing is that I started to go through many different changes in life. We decided to get pregnant again, but little did "I" realize that I was going to start all over again. My youngest was 5 at the time we found out. Come on now! I had just got past the whole diapers and bottles along with potty training and all! To start all over again just seemed like a never ending story to me. Time passed and we had our babygirl Aminah Bay. I felt like God blessed me once again with the most perfect thing in the world. All my worries and concerns went out the window the minute I held her for the first time.

About 10 years ago God gave me an angel and decided to take her back at just 2 weeks of being old. That will be another chapter! When I held Aminah in my arms I felt like God was giving me another chance. During our hospital stay I felt pretty ok, but when we went home my emotions skyrocketed and everything went completely left. I am pretty sure about 3 months or so passed and I brought up to my husband the fact that I needed help, mentally, emotionally and physically. You guys! Only 3 months had passed by and I was already feeling like I couldn't handle it. She is now 2. And WOW this whole toddler, tiny human is a whole different ball game.

Signed,

One Insane Mom.