Pregnant at University

University is a significant experience of every student's life; you’re pushed outside of your comfort zone from the get-go. Whether it’s learning how to live on a budget or how to use a washing machine, university constantly confronts you with new challenges. The idea of becoming pregnant during such an intense stage of life is a daunting one. As someone who has never experienced being pregnant at university, I reached out to a good friend of mine who gave birth to a beautiful baby girl this March all the while completing her most intense year at university yet.

Lisa became pregnant just before her third and final year studying a childhood and youth studies course. Although the pregnancy came as a surprise, it wasn’t an entirely unplanned one. The idea of having children was always a welcome one for Lisa and her partner of now four years. "We always said if it happens it happens." So Lisa came off her contraception and to their joy the pair became pregnant, much sooner than expected. Unlike many pregnancies that occur at university Lisa’s wasn’t completely unplanned and she had thought the situation through somewhat. "I always knew there was a possibility that I would get pregnant whilst at uni but it didn’t bother me much. I knew there would be options and worst-case scenario I could quit uni or take a year out." Planned or not their lives were about to change enormously, as was Lisa’s university experience.

The responsibility of a baby is overwhelming and it’s understandable for a pregnant student to consider dropping out. Lisa already struggled to find motivation on the course she was studying and found her pregnancy made the workload even harder to tackle.

"I was always tired, always doing something more important—decorating the baby’s room, buying the baby essentials... I’d always find an excuse not to start work."

Her one regret was that she didn’t get a head start on her work as everything got increasingly more challenging as her journey to becoming a mother progressed.

"My grades showed how being pregnant impacted my studying, they weren’t awful but I knew I could do a lot better. But passing university while being pregnant/having a baby was my priority and not what grade I graduated with."

One of Lisa’s points of advice for pregnant women at university is not to overwork yourself or do too much at once. Your stress levels will affect you as well as your child so if leaving uni with the highest grades possible is something you care about, perhaps taking a year out could be your best option. Lisa considered dropping out many times however the drive to prove she could complete her course as a pregnant woman and mother kept her working hard.

"I was planning how to tell my family and I knew every single one of them would assume that that was it for me. I knew I had no choice and couldn’t drop out or I’d never hear the end of it!" So she stuck with it and juggled her huge workload as well as her newborn baby—sometimes literally! "I would cradle her in one arm while writing exam notes in the other."

When it came to discussing her pregnancy with her university, Lisa was understandably apprehensive. However, her tutors turned out to be reassuring and helpful.

"My course leader was great. She offered me support and spoke to all my lecturers for me, informing them of my situation." Lisa was given more control over her deadlines and was allowed extensions on her work. "I contacted student support services who gave me some forms to fill out and send back in about how pregnancy would affect my studies and what extra support I would need."

Of course, every pregnant woman’s situation is unique as is how every university will handle student pregnancies differently. As a pregnant young woman, you may feel like you stand out in an environment like a university.

"I felt a lot of judgment from people around me and I put it down to the fact I look younger than I am. There isn’t much positivity around young/teen parents," she said.

Although it could feel scary and even isolating to walk your university campus with a huge baby bump, the important thing to remember that your baby is all that matters and the negative opinions other people may or may not think isn’t worth your time or energy.

When I asked Lisa how she felt about her child affecting her future career plans, the response I received was heartwarming.

"My daughter encourages me to strive for a good career and achieve my goals in order to support her financially and be a good role model for her."

Although it’s been tough, having a baby at university hasn’t held Lisa back or changed her future for the worse in any way. If anything having her baby has pushed and inspired Lisa to chase her dreams and be a woman for her daughter to look up to.