Not Your Typical Love Story

The year was 2014. I had just started my first job at Wendy’s, you were my manager, always smiling, making me laugh. You were taken at the time, but I’d always wondered what could be. Two years later, you let me go. The reason was understood, and though I was sad, I knew it was for the best.

The year was now 2016, I was a freshman in college, and saw you had updated your relationship status to single. So I took a chance and messaged you. We had so much fun together. Hit it off almost immediately, and after the first time we had gotten together, I knew that you were the one.

At the end of the semester, I moved in with you, a whole new level of closeness that was different than what I was used to, but not in a bad way. You changed me. Evolved me from a party girl who couldn’t commit to a love-smitten teenager.

After one month of being with you, we were expecting, it was the happiest moment for both of us when the stick finally read pregnant. And then things started to change...

All of a sudden you were sleeping all the time. Constantly exhausted, always struggling with migraines. As I grew further along, you started getting worse. It became harder, we started seeing doctors to try and figure things out, but unfortunately, we were constantly turned away with “I don’t know” or “You’re fine.”

The reality of things was that you weren’t fine. You had just started a new job, unloading trucks while I would stay home. Things were tough for a while, but as always, we saw it as just another obstacle we had to get through. So we stayed strong.

On February 22 I made the call, to let you know I was in labor. After 13 hours we welcomed our precious baby girl, Sophia Rose. The happiest day of our lives. Watching you become a father was the most endearing thing I have ever witnessed.

Until, once again, things started getting worse. It got to the point that you could no longer work; which was okay. I started working full-time to help support our family. And I have no regrets about doing that. I just wanted you to be better.

But he wasn’t getting better. Doctor after doctor; no one had an answer. You were losing weight, not eating, not the happy, outgoing man I had once known. But I still loved you, more than anything. And I knew that you couldn’t get through it alone. And I knew that Sophia and I needed you.

You were becoming discouraged, tired of all the doctors coming up inconclusive, and so was I. The worst feeling in the world is loving someone so much and having to watch them be in pain, knowing there’s nothing you can do to make the pain go away.

I knew how you would hide it. Smile and tell me that you were okay. Trying to hide the pain you were really feeling. We were moving place to place because we were low on money. Doing anything we could to support our family and make ends meet.

You started working nights because you didn’t know what else to do. And no one knew how much you were really going through because on the outside, you looked like any other person. But on the inside, you were dying.

Slowly, we started to drift apart. The conversation seemed less intimate. You seemed uninterested, or to not ever be in the same place I was in. I started working more. And then the memory loss began.

Some days you wouldn’t remember me leaving.

Most days you didn’t know what day it was.

Finally, after that last referral, we had an answer.

Lyme Disease.

I had heard of it before but never been aware of the significant toll it could take on a person's life. How could it change someone so critically to the point that you no longer recognize them?

You would wake up every day just trying to stay positive and pretend like everything was okay when it wasn’t. You stopped letting me in. You made it seem like it was just you in the fight. Worried that maybe you didn’t love me anymore, I was terrified.

I would continually remind myself of when we were together when I was in college. How happy we were. How much love we shared. I would tell myself “It’s not him, it’s the disease.” And I was right. The Lyme had been spreading for years on the inside where it was unable to be detected.

On May 28th, 2017, you proposed to me, in front of our friends and family. How emotional you became, reminded me that the love was still there. I had known all along yet I was lost in the pain and the depression that we would go through.

After this we were happy, for a little while. We moved into your mom's because we were unable to pay rent, I continued working as many hours as I could so we could find a place.

On August 5th, 2017, we were married, listening to your vows to me and the promises you made melted my heart. So many tears were wept that day, knowing that you were the one I would be spending the rest of my life with. I had never been so in love like this before.

In October, we finally found a place. And though you were in pain, you were willing to do a lot of the renovations that were needed to make it equipped for our family. You are strong. Even on your bad days. And that’s one of the things I love most about you.

Finally, we had a place we could call home. A more permanent place. Things were finally beginning to look up. We were referred to a Lyme disease specialist, which was the biggest blessing I could have ever asked for.

Unfortunately, our insurance was not accepted, but we were willing to do anything to get you feeling better, and with the support of both of our families, we were able to make the trip, and get you on a treatment plan.

On a list of 40 symptoms, you had 38, pointing directly to Lyme disease. When the doctor said it was affecting multiple areas of your body, even though I had already felt this deep down, I didn’t want to believe it.

If only it had been caught sooner. If only all ten (maybe more) of those doctors would have believed us when we said something wasn’t right. It had been spreading for YEARS. A realization that I didn’t want to come to was that you were sick. Really sick.

But I had learned to become understanding. I had learned to understand that the pain that your body was going through was unbearable and terrifying. And there was nothing I could do about it.

But we had hope. Hope that finally, this doctor would be the one that we have been praying for. The one who would let you live a normal life, and bring you back to the happy outgoing person you had once been.

It’s now May 2018.

I’m working two jobs to support us, you’re staying home with our now 15-month-old. About two to three months into your new diet and medicines. Things are looking up. And I have faith that we may have found a solution.

I am understanding of the fact that you have good days and bad days. And we now know to make the best of the good days when you have them.

We continue to keep a positive outlook on things whenever we can.

I hope our story may help some of you.

And I pray that if you or someone you love is suffering from an autoimmune disease, that you’re staying positive.

Do not let the doctors make you feel crazy. You know your body better than anybody else. Keep the faith, and stay strong. ❤️