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Mom, Leave Dad

An Open Letter to My Mom Who Has Suffered Physical and Emotional Abuse

By vann van goghPublished 5 years ago 3 min read
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Mom, you look so carefree here. From afar, I've always admired your ability to remain optimistic. But why do angels have it the worst? 

2011. The year I witnessed my mom being thrown around like a rag doll. He punched her face multiple times, then continued punching her on the stomach. I remember sitting on the staircase, bawling my eyes out, screaming for my dad to stop. It was the worst day of my life. Still, she forgave him. I forgave him too, burying the memory as years passed by. The three of us went on road trips, ate on restaurants, pretended for a while that we were a normal family.

Until now. October 27, 2018.

I was young and naive. My mom always prayed that dad would change. And for a while, we thought he did. Not until he started screaming at my mom again, shouted words that obviously implied he was belittling her. He started insulting her, throwing around statements that made me question myself: who is this man? Is this my dad? Is this the father I know?

I'm not a clueless little girl anymore. I've grown up and I now have the capacity to understand what's right and what's wrong. This isn't right anymore. I had to do something. So I confronted him, telling him who he was to make my mom cry like that. I hated seeing my mother cry. She whimpered like a dog and the sound of it made me blow up. I started cursing on my dad. He screamed back at me, telling me how disrespectful I am, not knowing that I got it from him. He exposed me to that kind of environment ever since I was an infant. And now, I only screamed at him because I was defending my mom. All children have the instinct to defend their mom whenever she's in pain. I was only using mine. I never screamed at him before because my respect for my dad was higher than the tallest building in the world. I looked up to him because he introduced me to so many things like video games, movies, music, photography, and etc.

That wasn't the case anymore. What mattered more than video games, movies, music, and photography was my mom. And he belittled her. Is this how you treat a wife? Tell her that she had no right to explain things because he only picked her up somewhere and clothed her, fed her? I asked him what he would do if I happen to have a husband in the future who would treat me the same way he treated mom. What was his response? That he didn't care if I got slapped by my future husband, because I was a silly girl with a bad attitude. Fathers are supposed to protect their daughters, be their hero. Any loving father would kill someone who would put a hand on their daughter. That's not the case with my dad. In that moment, I lost all my respect for him.

Mom, you don't deserve to be under the demonic wings of a man who doesn't know your worth. He's treating you like a dog on a leash. You're a human being, Mom. I hate to see you like this. I hate seeing you cry. One day, I'll get you out of this. Everything I'll do in life, I'll do for you. Mom, I don't care if we lose everything as long as we have each other. We'll succeed together. Mom, even if my own father doesn't protect us, I'll protect you. I may not be a son but once a girl finds her strength, it weighs more than a million steel. Now I've found my strength and my strength is you. You've braved 18 years under his control for me. Now it's my turn to be brave for you. You've taught me to be courageous, Mom. I love you. Always.

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