Mom at Fifteen

I grew up in the 80s and 90s in a very dysfunctional kind of way. People just didn't discuss things about your home life or what went on behind closed doors. My folks had quite the hatred towards one another and inevitably it ended the marriage. Not without casualties, unfortunately. My siblings and I had the worst time trying to cope.

So, we will fast forward three years when we decided to move from Massachusetts to North Carolina. Mom had family there and she decided we would make a clean break. I am pretty sure that break broke me. When we came here, it was a culture shock like nothing I had ever experienced.

I was not well liked or accepted in North Carolina. Every single day was a nightmare until I clicked with the outcasts and the more savory characters in school. They tended not to laugh so much at my "weird" accent or clothing choices. Of course, I didn't think it was me that had the accent.

Soon after I finally got comfortable, I ended up meeting someone who was as displaced as I was. We hung out and found solace in our friendship. In turn, it became love and then the physical aspect came. I got caught up in the feels and took it directly into serious when I became pregnant. Now, if you want a parent to take notice with the quickness, a pregnancy will certainly do that!!

So here I am. Huge choices laid in front of me with no direction on which way to go. My mother scheduled for me to terminate. That was not an option for me or the dad. We had grueling decisions ahead of us. Nothing was simple or clearly defined. It was no longer black and white, but all gray areas.

Pregnancy goes along smoothly. The birth? Not so much. For some reason, at 15 your concerns during labor and delivery fall on deaf ears. It was very quick and a rapid birth caused quite a few issues. She was breech and I had her naturally. There were 268 stitches and a complete reconstruction, but honestly? I didn't even notice. I heard her for the first time. I saw her beautiful face and everything else seemed to disappear.

I pushed and I fought with everything I had in me to give her the best life. I worked. I finished high school. I went to college. There were so many trials and so many things that I worried about and questioned. I did all of it. I saw to it that she had everything that she needed and most of what she wanted. I spent so much time worrying and there were tons of tears involved.

We made it! Through all her awkward years at school that she absolutely loathed. Through all the tears and fights. Through all the late nights. Through all the worrying, fretting, misunderstandings, arguments, and frustration.

There were so many fights with people who didn't believe in me. They tried to dissuade me from keeping her. I wasn't okay with that. It destroyed many relationships that I had with people because of the negativity and nastiness. I can count on one hand how many people I still speak to from that period in my life. I am quite alright about my decision to cut those people out.

She is currently 22. She is about to graduate college. She just got married and found out that she is going to be having a baby in the spring. She got a wonderful job working at a college that no one thought she'd ever go to. She has become the most amazing individual and to say that I am proud would be a gross understatement. She has excelled at life and while doing that she has become my very best friend.