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Life and Family

Balancing Motherhood, Marriage, and Education

Photo Credit: Pu En Af 315

Have you ever felt completely overwhelmed, like you can’t finish one simple task a day, or that you are rushing last minute to turn everything in? If so, you may be experiencing the excruciating task of balancing life and chores. As moms, dads, students, and humans in general, we pack on a lot and take on more than we can possibly manage at one given time. So why is it that we keep doing it, why is it that we keep adding more to the list, or why do we say “yes” to more than we can possibly do?

As a mom, I take on way more than I should, and as a mom to a special needs child, I really take on a lot. There is school, therapy, and extra outings, as well as the everyday routines that need to be done at home. Adding to my many extras for my child, there are also the needs of my husband. I am not saying that my husband is demanding; however, being married comes with it’s own set of challenges and balances. Spending time as a couple is so important and managing the house with limited time also adds stress to the relationship. Many households have two working adults so finding time within those work schedules can also be challenging. Then on top of that I am a full-time student working on my Bachelor's Degree in English. Let’s be real, I know I have got way too much on my plate. However, I seem to have found a balance that works. It may not work for everyone but it works for me.

Balance is the number one way to find peace and content with life and one's own happiness. It doesn’t come easy and it is hard to figure out. For me, I have found that certain things just need to be put off. Let's be real that laundry in the basket isn’t going to kill you if you leave it for another day, and if you forget to start the dishwasher it can be started before you go to bed. There are no rules to what makes balance work—it is just about finding what works for you and running with it. When it comes to doctor appointments and therapy for my child, it's all about writing everything down in the same place. I NEVER trust my phone. There are too many times that something gets erased or I don’t get notified, so write it down people! I keep the same type of agenda every year and at the beginning of the week I chart everything out. It honestly does help. When it comes to spending time with my husband, I find the little things to be the most important in our relationship. Whether it be getting coffee together or running errands together, it’s about the time we spend together. Finally, there is school. I honestly try and study whenever I can, in a waiting room, while my daughter plays with her toys, or while my husband is playing video games. There is no wrong time to study.

Now I know you are reading this and thinking: when does she do anything for herself, right? Well I make time for me even if it is just sitting in a hot bath with a glass of wine after I put my daughter to bed, or binge watching a random TV show until I fall asleep. Me time doesn’t have to be about pampering or spending money. It can just be about me finding the time to relax and decompress. I enjoy cooking so that works for me, as well as reading a good book—these are the moments I completely enjoy. Trust me you can balance it if you want to but it is also ok to say “NO.” Remember, people, it is not bad to say no—every now and then you have to. There aren’t enough hours in the day to do everything so manage what you can and learn to just enjoy the moments that matter and the people you love and care about. In the end, everything will fall into place and you will find the balance you truly want. 

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