Keeping up with Jemi's Life

I will talk about everything from my love life to my everyday life, I pretty much live two lives.

Writing My Own Story

Most parents hope for better things for their children. Some kids are raised up to live a happy and decent life. However, some parents ignore their kid’s wishes and dreams. They impose their ideas and expect the youths to be perfect in everything. That takes any choices away from children who they would probably like to be. I have become the victim of this absurd and unfair system and I’m reaping the fruits of my broken childhood till today.

From the moment of being a little girl, my parents wanted me to keep up with everything. I was forced to do what I didn’t like. On the top of that, they didn’t even manage to support me anyway. I had no desire to disappoint my parents, so I kept on living like that. After going through a tough childhood and moving around, I realized my family didn't have time for me and loved my brother more. They would ignore the good or bad news because, at the end of the day, I was a prodigy for them left alone with my own issues. I never felt love or had any individual time with my mom or dad to talk about my life. This is where my second life comes in place. I was a complete lost cause to my family. I started living like there wasn't any other day. My anxiety was getting worse, then I experienced some crazy and ridiculous things: drinking, drugs, meeting strangers on the daily basis, and traveling. Each day I was ready to get into trouble such as fights or accidental dates out of boredom or as an experiment. That was due to not having the freedom before to meet men or hang out. At the end of the day, I questioned myself: “Why are the things going like this? Aren’t there any other chances for me?” I was attended by these questions every night and I have nobody to share them with. So I just went on burning my life.

The other night I was walking home and the local book store’s display screen dragged my attention. I saw there Damned by Chuck Palahniuk. The cover and title seduced me to buy it the next day. It took me only two days to finish this. I was into this story because the main character was like me with similar problems. This is a daughter of a famous actress who accidentally commits suicide and goes to hell. There she rejects to stand still and starts her searching for the way out. Besides, in this case, hell isn’t that what we are used to imagining. This place can be described as one very similar to our world with its own details. Having read this, one thing came into my mind. You don’t need to die to feel like in hell. We already live in the infernal, spoilt and cursed world. And it makes sense only when we attempt to overcome it and ourselves. Like the girl from Damned, we must fight. I must fight. It is hard to believe that one book was able to change my mind and make me give up on abusing drugs, alcohol, and to say goodbye to all bad people I met up with. However, it took me so long to leave these all behind. After I made it through, I wanted other people to know how I felt all this time of struggling against the memories from my broken childhood and addiction. So I decided to write my own story about a little girl who was born in hell. The girl who is looking for the way out. The girl who hopes for all good.

Message to the youth: Don't assume, judge, or underestimate people based on their appearance.