How to Survive Having a Baby in NICU

As women we all picture this perfect pregnancy, having our water break and rushing to the hospital. But, like many, that is never the case. I was hospitalized at 34 weeks into my pregnancy due to preeclampsia, which didn't even come on until a couple of weeks before and then all of sudden became severe and they sent me to the hospital for evaluation in labor and delivery.

My first thought was: "What do I say when I call my husband..." No one had any idea if I would have to get induced, if I would have to have a C-section due to my extremely high blood pressure, or if I would be sent home. I sat in my car after I left my doctor's office. I held my phone in my hand and tried to give myself the strength to call my husband. When you don't expect anything out of a check-up, you get caught off guard. But, believe me, if you ever go through this... call someone. Anyone. It is better to let out your emotions and feelings, especially when you're pregnant as you do not want it to become overwhelmed and stressed out.

Getting Monitored at the Hospital

My husband met me at the hospital and after being put on the monitors, they reached decision... I would be staying the night for further testing. We were then told we should get a tour of NICU just in case they decided to induce me.

What you don't realize are how many babies end up in the NICU and how many families have to go through it, many not knowing what is going to happen next or how to feel.

Let me start off by saying I was scared. We had no idea what to expect and it was our first baby. Would she be ok, would I be able to hold her, would I be able to be like "normal" moms?

First off, it's nothing like I would have expected. I had my baby at 2:14 AM and I held her while my husband cut the cord and they rushed her to NICU, at which time my husband went with her. Not every mom gets to hold their child. I am now grateful that J got to hold her but at that time I was mad, sad, upset, and outright tired. I had my baby and couldn't even see her after that brief moment.

The nurses informed me I could see her at 10:30 AM. I couldn't sleep, I had been up for three days on a bunch of machines, and now they told me I had to wait to see my baby!! I became very depressed and angry. But it does get better. It doesn't feel like it at the moment but it will. Below is a picture of when I first got to actually hold her.

Even though you feel and look horrible... take pictures.

The one thing that made it easier was that I was still a patient through most of the time she was in NICU. But even then she had jaundice and was under the blue light for five days in which time we could only hold her for 10 minutes each shift (20 minutes all day).

Now if you aren't a patient, hospitals have community housing, RV parking, or special pricing for hotels near them so don't be afraid to ask. And especially when you're in this position, don't be afraid to ask for help. You have a lot on your plate and you should try to make it easier.

After two weeks she was moved to the special care NICU unit where the next step was to go home! By this time, I was pushing to get released as a patient so I could be in her room (which was her own private room). To get her discharged, she had to be gaining weight, nursing/sucking on a bottle, blood work ok'd, and to pass the car seat test without needing oxygen. Luckily we had a night shift nurse who helped us get all of our needs checked off. I ended up bottle feeding her breast milk because she sometimes had difficulty breastfeeding because I had to use a shield. But at least this way she gained the weight she needed to go home.

The only complications she had was a heart murmur which is common and she had to be on a CPAP machine for a couple of days after her birth.

If you take anything from this, just remember that the NICU staff is great and always ask for help. Don't be afraid to talk to someone. I was severely depressed and it weighed on my husband. If I had someone to talk to, it would have helped so much, or at least to have known what to expect having your baby in NICU.

She is now 6-months-old and is happy and healthy.

From Premature to 6 Months 💛