Giving Birth for the First Time

Everything about having a baby was different than I imagined it would be. I was terrified about the pain and the chaos of giving birth. I didn’t know how I would handle being in so much pain, especially unbearable pain that is childbirth based on what I had seen on TV. Once I found out I was pregnant, I think I was actually in denial about the fact that the baby would have to come out ever. I just kept putting the thought out of my mind.

Before becoming pregnant, I could not have cared less about what mothers had to say about giving birth. I would just smile and nod until the story was over. Once I was pregnant, I was more interested but also horrified at the same time. What if I couldn’t get an epidural in time? What if it wore off? What if, God forbid, I ended up having to give birth in a car? It seems that many women will tell horror stories about giving birth to expectant mothers. Maybe it is some sort of initiation or rite of passage.

Thankfully, I took a birthing class following the suggestion of my doctor, allowing me to become much more knowledgeable and resulting in a much better experience than I ever believed possible. Since learning about childbirth and eventually having my own story to tell, I now actually really enjoy hearing all of the gory or not so gory details. Oddly enough now that two years have passed I worry I will forget the events of the labor and delivery of my son, so here is a play by play to the best of my recollection.

Friday, July 1, 2016

11:30 a.m.

I was 39 weeks pregnant to the day and I went to get a manicure and pedicure. I had read some article or blog post about how it is nice to have painted nails when the baby arrives since there are so many pictures of you holding the baby. I got a gel manicure, so I figured even if the baby was late I would hopefully still have my pretty nails. Looking back on it now, it seems so silly, and there are very few pictures where my nails are noticeable. Either way, it was nice to be pampered and do something fun while chatting with the woman doing my nails about the baby that was almost here. Although a pedicure may seem inconsequential to the birth of my child, I start with this detail because I went into labor about twelve hours later and I always wonder if the foot rub during the pedicure had anything to do with it.

3:30 p.m.

I had my weekly doctor’s appointment. I was only dilated one centimeter but my doctor said he could feel the baby, which freaked me out a little bit, and that once I went into labor it probably wouldn’t take long for the baby to be born. He said to come back next week and if there still wasn’t much progress by my due date we might want to start talking about induction. Basically, I felt pretty confident that the little bugger wasn’t going to be making an appearance any time soon.

11:00 p.m.

I was still awake watching Modern Family because, let’s face it, trying to sleep when 39 weeks pregnant is almost impossible. I felt a couple little cramps here and there but I kept closing my eyes, trying to fall asleep. Modern Family ended and I still wasn’t sleeping. I still felt some cramping, so I started to get suspicious. I got some water, went to the bathroom, got my phone, and laid back down. I downloaded a contraction counting app but figured I was probably not having contractions yet. I started timing the pains, which later I found out actually were contractions, and they were about eight minutes apart and didn’t last long. However, they kept coming in about eight minute intervals, so I figured it was time to wake my husband, Bruce.

Saturday, July 2, 2016

12:00 a.m.

“I think I might be having contractions,” I said to my husband. He usually doesn't wake up too easily, but that woke him up. He asked if I was sure and I told him I was timing them.

“What should I do?” he asked. The only thing I could think of was to pick up around the house.

Much to my chagrin, our place was under construction because we were building an addition to our house. This was something weighing on my mind, but I thought I still had at least a little bit of time to worry about it. Pretty much all of my friends had gone past their due date with their first pregnancy, and I knew that was common from my experience working as a receptionist for my OBGYN years ago. Therefore, I figured I had a good two weeks before the baby would get here. The nursery and our room were baby ready, but the rest of the house definitely was not.

Sitting in our incomplete house thinking I was probably in labor was not the least stressful situation, but I had other things on my mind. I thought about what we had learned in our birthing class and the nurse had said to try to labor at home for as long as possible. Some suggestions were to take a bath and eat because once you arrive at the hospital you wouldn’t be allowed to eat until after the baby was born. I wasn’t hungry since I was nervous, although not as nervous as I imagined I would be. I did take a bath for a while which was nice. Eventually, my contractions were coming closer together, about four or five minutes apart, and were lasting for about a minute so we decided to go to the hospital.

3:00 a.m.

It felt very weird getting to the hospital and walking up to the labor and delivery department. When I imagined going to the hospital to give birth I had always envisioned some dramatic scene, but that was not the case. I signed in and was hooked up to a machine to monitor contractions in triage. The nurse checked to see if I was dilated. I was honestly worried I wasn’t more than a centimeter dilated like earlier that day and imagined the nurse thinking I was just being overly concerned. However, I had gotten to two centimeters, so some change had been made. She asked me my pain level and I said about a four. She said that I must have a high pain tolerance. This was an interesting comment I will never forget because before that day I had always felt like I was a bit of a wimp when it came to pain.

So, I was dilated, but a very small amount. They had me walk laps around the floor with Bruce for about an hour, timing the contractions. That part of the night was not fun mostly because I was so tired. I had never fallen asleep and it was close to 4:00 a.m. already. Eventually, I said they were getting closer together and felt more intense. The nurse came back to check if I had dilated more and while she was checking me, my water broke. I was four centimeters. She said I wouldn't be leaving the hospital without a baby.

4:00 a.m.

The nurse warned me that my contractions would start to get more painful, and she was right, but I was still able to breathe through them. Before going into labor, I thought the idea of focusing on breathing was kind of silly, but it really did help me get through each contraction. I remembered how we had learned that the contractions are a productive pain that come in waves, so I just focused on getting through each wave. I signed a bunch of paperwork, got some blood drawn, and was brought to a delivery room.

4:30 a.m.

After getting set up and answering a few questions, I was finally ready for my epidural. The contractions still were not unbearable, but they definitely were not pleasant, and I was ready to be numb. By this point I was feeling more antsy to get the epidural going than scared about having the epidural administered. Before that day, the thought of getting the epidural was very scary, but the most painful part was the shot to numb the area. I remember there was a weird reflex where my leg kicked and part of my body felt cold, which I was warned might happen, but in about five minutes I was in heaven.

5:30 a.m.

The nurses switched shifts around this time and I met my nurse, Kathleen, who would be with my during the rest of my delivery. The nurse before Kathleen had been okay, but she never changed my bedding after my water broke, which Kathleen took care of right away. I was very nervous to get a catheter for the first time ever, but with the epidural I didn’t feel a thing. I asked if I could go to sleep and she said I could. I never thought I’d sleep during labor, but I did, and it was wonderful. I felt a tiny bit badly for Bruce because he had nothing to do but watch the TV in our room that had no sound. Of course, I didn’t feel too badly for him as I was the one about to push out a baby.

7:30 a.m.

I woke up about two hours later. From then until it was time to push, all I really remember was eating ice chips, getting a big exercise ball put between my legs to help the baby get into position, and being periodically checked to see how dilated I was. I wasn’t in pain except for one small section on my side, but it was only a small discomfort. Kathleen said that sometimes the epidural wouldn’t completely numb certain areas so that must have been the case. I was given one of those buttons to get more medicine pumping through the epidural, but the button was broken. Luckily, the anesthesiologist came back once when the pain was getting worse and got me numbed up again, although I never completely lost feeling in that one spot.

The other thing I remember during this time was finding out my doctor wouldn’t be there and I would have an on call doctor. I was disappointed, but I was starting to see that I wasn’t going to see the doctor for a while anyway, and as long as I had Kathleen I would be in good shape.

12:30 p.m.

Around 12:30 p.m. I was dilated enough to start pushing. I remember thinking it was odd to push when the doctor wasn’t there, but I later realized that the doctor really just needs to be there for the final push. My contractions slowed down a little bit and they gave me some pitocin. A little while later that same spot on my side was getting very sore and I started to feel nauseous. I even ended up vomiting a little, so we took a fifteen minute break. That was probably the worst part of my whole experience. After taking the break I felt ready to push and I just wanted to meet my baby!

I soon found out that they don’t call it “labor” for no reason. I was so exhausted, but I kept pushing each time I was told to push and rested in between each contraction. The doctor kept coming in to check on me and eventually it was time for that final push. The epidural had worn off a little bit, but still, the pain was not unbearable.

2:09 p.m.

I was finally introduced to my baby boy! We hadn’t found out the sex beforehand, so finding out we had a son was extra special. Unlike many women, I didn’t cry. The whole moment just felt so surreal. Had I really just given birth? Was a really a mom now? It took a few minutes to sink in. I held my baby for a couple minutes and the doctor stitched me up. This was another part of giving birth that terrified me, but again, I was saved by the epidural. I had some feeling, but it wasn’t pain. I was also able to look at and hold my baby, so I know I was distracted.

I started bleeding more than the doctor and nurses would have liked. I sensed that it was a little tense and one of the nurses make a joke about how redheads bleed more, something I had never heard. Like I said, I was distracted, so the details are fuzzy, but eventually everything was normal and I was given a prescription for iron pills because of the blood loss.

3:00 p.m.

About an hour later the epidural had worn off and it was time for me to try to walk and use the restroom. This was the part no one had warned me about. There was definitely burning, but still not unbearable pain. Kathleen was amazing and helped me in every way. I would have never thought I would feel so comfortable being completely naked and peeing in front of a stranger, but I really was. I decided that although I loved my OB, the fact that he wasn’t there wasn’t much of an issue, but I would have been lost without the amazing nurses. She showed me all of the fun postpartum accessories I’d be using including giant, diaper sized pads, disposable underwear, a peri-bottle, Dermaplast, and Tucks. I got well acquainted with those accessories over the next few weeks.

I was able to nurse my son, another thing that had worried me, and we decided to supplement as well. We changed our first diaper and finally ate lunch. We starting calling a few family members to share the good news.

8:00 p.m.

After what felt like forever, we eventually were moved to a postpartum room that was much more comfortable. There I learned all about breastfeeding. We stayed at the hospital until the next evening when we were discharged.

Sunday, July 3, 2016

10:00 pm

One my favorite parts of my son’s birth story is that although we told a few family members about the baby, none of our friends knew he had arrived. One of my friends was having a 4th of July party that night, so we went home so I could change, and headed over to the party. Everyone was so shocked and excited, especially since my due date wasn’t for another week. I had actually been telling people the baby was due a week later than the actual due date to avoid having annoying calls of, “Is the baby here yet?” as the date approached. So again, it was a big surprise for everyone.

Obviously, our lives changed a great deal after that day. I was pleasantly surprised and satisfied with the way my whole birth experience turned out. Healing and breastfeeding was definitely a process. I felt the weeks following having the baby were much more intense and uncomfortable than the actual delivery. Despite all of that, I was in love. Within a few weeks I was already thinking about how I wanted my son to have a sibling and felt ready to do it all over again. As luck would have it, when my son was three months old I found out I would be expecting baby number two. That is a birth story for another time.