Family. You think that it is all happy memories and great moments when you think of that word. But for a majority of people it is quite the opposite. Whether it's to a small extent or a huge one.
I used to believe that family meant happiness and love all the time. But that is not the case well at least not anymore. I pushed aside any doubts I had about family being all wondrous and loving years ago but just recently accepted it as fact. It was hard on me but it was the best decision for me to do. I couldn't keep living in the dark any longer.
I am not saying that I feel this way towards all my family because I don't. I just feel this way towards a majority of them. Mainly just the family members of my dad's side of the family. They bring me down constantly and never have anything positive to say to me. They judge everything I do and say that I am not ready to go forward in life because I'm not mature enough in their eyes.
I couldn't take the constantly being put down anymore because I've worked my butt off to get to the place where I am today. Yeah I don't have a lot going for me anymore but the plans I have made are for my future. I plan to move out of state soon and start saving up to get my own vehicle. I cut off an entire side of my family and I feel nothing but relief.
It's hard to explain what all my dad's side of the family has done to me because they've done a lot over the years. Always saying terrible things about whoever I am in a relationship with or attacking my life choices that I make. In their eyes I can never do anything right.
They refuse to see me as the mature woman that I have grown into. My dad's side of the family are a negative bunch I can tell you that much. Not all of them but sadly a majority of them are. Always bringing you down even if it's over something as small as studying to get your license. No positivity comes from them ever it feels like. I refuse to keep negative people in my life, whether they are family or not. I have no time to waste on people who only want to bring me down.
I love my family don't get me wrong but it's time I put my feelings first. I have a lot of support and love from the other side of my family and I am thankful for that. The stress of cutting off an entire side of my family is really taking its toll on me. But it is what's best for my well being and for me to go forward in my life.
Family should be people that you can always go to no matter what you go through. I feel deeply for those who are unable to have this with their family and it's worse than the small things that I go through. No one deserves to go through being put down and not cared for. That's why I always make sure to help those around me on a daily basis because you never know what anyone is going through.
Even if you do not have a supportive, loving family to be there for you, you are still surrounded by people who love you and care for you even if you don't realize it.
From my experience family doesn't have to be people that you are related to by blood or marriage. Family can be people you meet and grow a connection with. They can be your very best friends or your best friend's family.
What I'm trying to say is that family isn't labeled by blood, it is labeled by trust, honesty, loyalty, and most of all love. If you don't have any of that from someone you see as family then they aren't family. All of that should come naturally to someone who is a member of your family. It should never have to be forced or faked.