Can't Pick Them...But You Love Them

Sibling Relationships

The connections we make with our siblings are the very first types of relationships we learn to make at a young age. I grew up in a family of five. Though I am one of three siblings. I am the one that is the middle. I have an older brother and a younger sister. My brother and I are about 18 months apart. We are closer now in our adult ages than we ever were when we were younger. He tormented me, pushed me out of trees, punched me in the arm as we passed each other in the hallway. But nonetheless, I love him dearly. Now that we are both older, and married, and starting families of our own, our sibling relationship has grown and we see eye to eye. Though he still tries to throw me in the pool, every time we are at Mom's and Dad's for a BBQ. 

Then there is my little sister, who is about four-and-a-half years younger than I. She and I have just never been close. We are as different as night and day. I love her dearly still, though it is tough to be in the same room as her and not get into a little tiff. My sister is just the total complete opposite of me. She doesn't like camping, or hiking, she is seldom selfless, she complains about everything, and she is just totally completely judgmental about the most insignificant things. 

When my sister and I were younger, she was always tattle tailing on me and blaming me for things I didn't do. Then when I got to high school, she shoved me for thinking that I stole her jeans and was wearing them. Then when I shoved her back, my parents grounded me, even though her jeans were laying in a pile on the floor by her bed. Even still, she has a way of making herself seem like the helpless one. My parents still do everything for her, and she is now 26 years old.

Things with my sister are always hit and miss. She is either really chill, whenever I see her, or she instantly says some sarcastic remark on my outfit or about something that I didn't have anything to do with. I dress totally normal: jeans and a cute t-shirt with my flip flops. My sister likes to make remarks about my husband sometimes, and that really bugs me. My husband and I have been married for almost three years and have been together for almost nine, so he has been around for a while. I love him tons, and he treats me really well. The minute I ask a question about her boyfriend, she calls me a gossip, then my mom will intervene and tell me to stop picking on my sister. Our relationship is much like a rollercoaster. It has its ups and downs, and still times. More often than not we are not on the same page, but it is really nice when we are.

Like I said, I love her, but we are as different as night and day, and there are times where I really do miss my sister and wish that we could just go get our nails done or get a quick coffee or lunch. Those are things my brother would do with me. He wouldn’t get his nails done, but we would catch up over coffee or a lunch or he would come over for a dinner with his wife and kids.

Needless to say, siblings can be difficult to get along with, but they are family, and regardless of their personalities, it is nice to know that you have a family. It is nice when we three are all able to go to my parents on the same day, and all be at the same place all at the same time.

It has been especially hard because my brother has been stationed in Germany, and has been there for about four years. We miss him terribly and have gone to visit, but it still isn't the same as having him an hour's drive away. These relationships are up and down and teach you that people are different, and it is okay to be different, but still miss and want them to be in our lives. I love my brother and sister and I couldn’t imagine my life without them. Siblings are those people you don't get to choose, but sometimes it is nice when you choose to be around them. 

Read next: It Killed Us All
Pheobe Paris
Pheobe Paris

I am your girl next door who loves hanging out with my dog, and camping and hiking and through backpacking. I love traveling, cooking, and just having fun with my husband and friends. 

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Can't Pick Them...But You Love Them
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