Blessings from the Womb

About two years ago, I had people I liked to consider as friends. I hung out with these people, stayed the night with them, went to parties with them, etc. I was young, fell in love, and messed my whole life up over a relationship that was just as disgusting as it could be; the more I think about it as an adult, the more vulgar it becomes. Well, this was a person I'd known for years already. Also, I was introduced to so much; I was introduced to drinking, drugs, a whole list of things no 17 year old should.

We break up and it hurts my heart so bad that I started being the most aggressive person. Hitting things, throwing phones, crying all the time, saying I didn't care to everything even if it was something like, 'your dog just died'. Just cold and heartless. I met a guy and eventually moved on and loved him so much that I rushed myself into things. I mean I already had one failed relationship and knew the person for what seemed like eons, so it couldn't be too bad this time.

He made me feel like a queen, took me places, let me meet all his friends, loved on me the way I should be, and this was just a normal relationship. But a thing I wish I knew was that he was very bad on drugs and I ended up getting pregnant. Now I was going through a lot in my mind. What am I going to do? I can't even support a child with my problems and trust issues. I went through a lot as a kid and didn't want her to go through the same, ever.

But I decided to keep her and handle my responsibility, even if it meant changing into something I wasn't used to. A mother. I stayed home away from all that was bad, quit hanging out with "friends" that kept me in the same loop, and most importantly took care of me and my daughter the way I should've— and man was she a blessing.

I have a smile for every day of the week, even on my bad ones. When I wake up in the morning, her smile is the first thing I see and it's the most beautiful thing. If we didn't have the sun, she would have no problem taking it's place. She is my light in the darkness.

If you read this, this was not only to tell you about how my daughter pretty much saved me from myself, but how I came from such a struggle into soon having my cosmetology license. How I came from nothing, without literally having Christmas and Thanksgiving, to being able to somehow provide that. And I have no one to thank but God, some good people, and most importantly my daughter. Thank you.