Families is powered by Vocal.
Vocal is a platform that provides storytelling tools and engaged communities for writers, musicians, filmmakers, podcasters, and other creators to get discovered and fund their creativity.
How does Vocal work?
Creators share their stories on Vocal’s communities. In return, creators earn money when they are tipped and when their stories are read.
How do I join Vocal?
Vocal welcomes creators of all shapes and sizes. Join for free and start creating.
To learn more about Vocal, visit our resources.Show less
Being a mother is amazing...However, it can be very hard, especially as a young mother.
You have people who support you and people who shame you. Some people just avoid you altogether. If any of this sounds familiar, then you'll need to hear this.
Being as young as I am and having a daughter, I can tell you this: "It's easily hard raising a child." Many times I've had people talking about my style of raising my daughter. Many were good things and some not so much. You see, we live in a world where things have to fit into society's pocket, otherwise we are "wrong" or just plain "crazy."
However, I am not the kind to bend a knee at numbers. These tips are far out of society's grasp and judgments. So, if that bothers you, now is your chance to stop reading.
Choices and How to Decide
Like I said before, being my age and having a child, people will have a lot to say. If you feel like you're being overwhelmed with people's thoughts and opinions, then here's what I've done:
Simply ignore the people you do not know. This usually eliminates more than half of the people judging or controlling you. This allows you to make better decisions and think a little more clearly.
I've had friends who either stopped talking to me during my pregnancy unless they needed something or friends who would make fun and judge me. The simplest but hardest thing to do is to completely cut them off. If they aren't there for you when you need it, then they shouldn't be there at all.
During my pregnancy, I was single and many guys wanted to date me. Me being me, I knew it wasn't because of my social status. Even to this day, guys try to friend request me or message me. Men seem to think women who have had children at a young age are "easy" because we have had a child so young. The easiest thing to thin out the good from the bad is to ask these three questions:
1. What can you do for me and my child today?
If they start saying what they can do in the future, cut them off. You and your child a priority number one. You shouldn't be put off for the "future."
2. What do you want to gain from a relationship with me?
This is usually where guys say you are the prize. Cut him off if he does. This is no longer about you, but about your child. If he is focused on your body or facial features more than he is your child, then he isn't ready to be with a woman and her child.
3. What kind of father would you be?
Now this one is tricky and depends upon you. What kind of father do you want your child to have?
Remember: don't introduce your child to every man you date or see. This will confuse your child and break trust between the two of you.
If you find these helpful, let your friends or family who are going through the same as us know. Maybe we can help them, as well. I will have more tips and how to's posted twice a week. I hope this helped you, and GOD BLESS YOU!