Cindy Del Villar

Children on the Spectrum

After my son Caleb was born, at about four months old I knew something was a bit "off" with him. He made no eye contact and didn't smile much. I had a nurse that would make weekly visits to my home (from the nurse and family partnership program) and when she made a milestone check-up on Caleb, she confirmed my suspicion. She said she would monitor Caleb more because she suspects he might be autistic. Sure enough by the time he was six months old, my nurse referred him to early intervention and Caleb was evaluated. For the next few months, he was seen by therapists and evaluated thoroughly for any physical delays, occupational delays, and cognitive delays, as well as speech delays. I didn't know much about autism so I wasn't devastated by the time he was officially diagnosed when he turned two. I did however feel guilt for a while. Maybe if I didn't work so hard while I was pregnant. Maybe if I had a better diet. Maybe if I slept a bit more. Guilt was what I felt. I started learning more about autism and tried to understand my son. Little things that I didn't know would matter, actually mattered. For example, one of the psychiatrist took a toy away from Caleb's hand during an evaluation to see how he would react. In return Caleb tried to take the toy back. I thought he did good but the psychiatrist said Caleb never once made eye contact with him. Usually a child would study a person's face to see what the expression was like. Caleb just focused on getting the toy back. It was like there wasn't even a person in front of him at all. After trying for a few seconds, Caleb gave up and just took another toy. Apparently any other child would've tried a bit more to retrieve the toy or even cry. When calling Caleb's name he would never react or look at whomever was calling him. You had to physically go to him, grab his face and have him look at you. This was also unusual in a child at that age apparently. He didn't acknowledge people or his surroundings.