Another Parenting Article

Look, I get it. There have been 100+ hot takes on parenting lately. It's either about how hard it all is and how many moms are full of regrets, or it's about the dangers of co-sleeping, or it's about technology and your kid.

And I get it, because I've read them all, but what I don't get is why no one has written about what we are all thinking as parents. No one is truly getting to the heart of the problem. And no, I'm not talking about how your relationships change with friends, family, and alcohol. I'm not coming out on the for or against co-sleeping debate, and I'm certainly not going to go deep into the absolutely insane hormonal changes that ravage a woman's brain and body. Nope. The internet is already full of these.

I'm not going to put my spin on why everyone should or should not have a kid. I'm not going to debate the moral or ethical ramifications of having a child today when we are overpopulated and the climate is trying to kill us. Better writers and thinkers have already expounded on these.

I'm not here to alleviate your fears about being a good or bad parent: about "game theory" being the latest choice for disciplining your kid, about the benefits of the flu shot (wait, just get the flu shot) versus the fact-less fears about not getting it. I'm definitely not going to get into the diaper debate, but did you see that in other parts of the world there are crotch-less pants for kids to just relieve themselves where they go? No diapers. Maybe that's a good idea? Because the Earth is pretty mad and I bet our millions of diapers in landfills aren't helping her cool off.

I'm not going to talk about food. That is just a landmine. I'm not going to delve into the guilt felt when you don't hand craft your own blend of mush for your infant vs spending $2 at the grocery store for the pre-made kind. You could fill volumes of books on what your kid should be eating and I just can't get into that.

Of course, then there are products for your babies; what toys are safe and educational. I can't get into that because half the time those stories are sponsored and I don't have any sponsors.

I won't dissect the complicated topic of society and its treatment of mothers. I mean, the expectations on a woman to be a mom, hold the household together, and climb the corporate ladder is intense on its own, but then add that there is barely enough affordable daycare or pre-post school care so that the parent is running around like a maniac trying to get their kids from one place to another and just thinks forget it and becomes a stay-at-home mom, but then gets judged by her book club for not "working." Nope. I'm sure you've read a million articles on that. I just can't.

No, this is not what this article is about. This is not about the fact the pregnancy and parenthood is overwhelming enough without another opinion on how you should be doing it because you are definitely doing it wrong. It's hard enough trying to figure out your kid's emotional landscape, let alone maintain your own health. Last thing you need is someone else saying how close you are to raising a sociopath.

The breastfeeding conversation is insane out there. You don't need me to add to that furor. I mean, wow, if you can do it, do it. If not, don't.

I mean, there was just an article about how a mom's behaviour in the first year of life results in permanent building blocks in your kid that could either make them amazing or lead them to years of therapy. You are on the clock from the moment sperm and egg meet. No pressure.

I'm not here to discuss what would be the polite way to tell people to stay out of your business. If you are a parent and you've left your house with a child, chances are you've talked to a stranger, or rather, they have talked at you. And chances are they've said cute things, but every once in a while, you get offhand comments suggesting that you could be doing things better.

No, I'm here to talk about what we are all really thinking about. And no, it's not the latest I don't like my kid take or whether attachment parenting produces weaklings.

It's this. This is what we are all wondering. Am I doing OK? The answer is yes. Unless you aren't. But you probably are. Just don't google it.