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I'm the youngest of three siblings.
There's my older sister, who I will call 'S' for privacy reasons, and then my older brother 'N'. S is much older than the both of us, and, at first glance, it's more than easy to tell just that. However, the case with my brother N is a little different-
Fraternal one's mind you.
Now, when many think of twins there are a few questions that come to mind: "Do they look alike?" "How far apart are they?" or, "Who's the older one?" For those of you who aren't familiar with the term 'fraternal twins', they are twins that are not from the same egg cell, but rather are from two separate eggs with two separate sperms.
Fraternal twins can consist of two boys and two girls; but the more common are one boy and one girl, and this includes my brother and I.
To put this simply: Yes, fraternal twins are still twins; and yes, many will ask them the same (sometimes stupid) questions as identical twins.
And that's what this little article is going to be about: questions people have asked both N and I growing up!
I know, some of these them might sound a little ridiculous (and unfortunately, again, very stupid), but that's what I'm here for! To answer all your twin burning questions! And on behalf of all the other twins of the world, including triplets, quadruplets, etc. -- you're welcome.
Question 1: "So when's your brothers/sisters birthday?"
Now, this might seem rather innocent enough, but this question is usually followed right after "so when's your birthday?" and as soon as you answer, they ask this.
If someone doesn't know you or your sibling very well, or aren't aware of the fact that you even have a twin at all, then this is fine. In my case I just answer the question and the conversation moves forward. HOWEVER, there are people I have known for literally yeeaaars that have asked this, and I know it's probably not intentional, maybe they do it to get on my nerves, but seriously, just think before you ask. Think.
This is something every now and then twins are asked, and it's especially a pet peeve of mine. I myself have been asked this numerous times, and after a while, it gets really old. Some people ask this because they probably feel as if twins need to, for whatever reason, prove that they're a twin, just by giving others information such as a simple birthday. It might not be a big deal to all twins, but this does just happen to be one of the most ridiculous ones people have asked me, and again, I absolutely can't stand it.
It's ridiculous for a variety of reasons. So please, pick another topic to start a conversation if you can.
Question 2: "Do you know how the other feels when you're not there? Do you feel each other's pain?"
This is a tricky one, and the answer is...yes and no.
Rumor has it that apparently most twins are telepathic, for whatever reason, but the truth is it's kind of true.
From personal experience, I have had things happen to me that would honestly be considered odd compared to other siblings, and a great example to this takes place back in the good ol' days of middle school.
It was during one of the many dances the school held to make up for their low government funding budget. I was eating some pizza with a few of my friends when I suddenly got this splitting headache. It was very painful, and at some point I thought I was going to throw up, but, fortunately, it only lasted for a few minutes and I was able to continue eating and chatting. Not long after this another good friend of mine came up to me and said, "Hey, your brother just fell and hit his head pretty hard!"
There are a few other experiences I've had similar to this one, but not only is it the more recent, it's also one of the most interesting one.
Twins do experience this feeling from time to time, I've heard and read many cool stories myself that are either very similar to this one or even better. Don't be shy to ask this question. It's a genuine question, and I'm sure any twin would be happy to answer!
Question 3: "Do you guys have to share everything?"
'Sharing is caring' as the saying goes, but if I find it first, it's mine.
Twins are just like any other siblings, except no one is exactly a lot ‘older’ per say, and is obligated to be entitled to more than the other.
It really depends on the household you're raised in. For N and I, we were treated pretty fairly (except for that one time when he got to see a pg 13 movie when we were 10 because, "He's older than you" - Dad), but there were occasions where one could have something the other couldn't, mostly for disciplinary reasons.
Question 4: "Do you guys act alike? Have similar personalities?"
Sometimes twins can have a lot in common, that includes their likes and dislikes, but again they are two different people. So yes, they might look alike but they will always have their difference in taste and opinions (much like other siblings).
In my case, N and I have NOTHING in common (excluding out birthdays). He looks and acts MUCH differently then I do.
Fun fact: He's 6'2" while I remain the size of a bean. (5'1"). People still think I'm 13 around him, and until I was 16 I always got the kids menu at restaurants (and used them for discounts too.)
That butt still calls me his armrest....
Question 5: "What's it like being a twin?"
Honestly, it's like you've already been born with a best friend.
You always have someone by your side no matter what you say or do, and you also have a better chance at receiving another kidney if you ever need one tbh.
With a twin you always have someone to talk to and joke around with. And when you're both young this is especially helpful; you never get bored! Of course, as you get older there will be times you just can't stand your other half, but for the most part twins love one another and wouldn't know what to do with themselves if they didn't have each other (at least I wouldn't).
Being a twin can also be hard, however, especially if you're the younger one like myself. Despite only being a minute apart with N, there are some who still compare us. For example, if N gets a better test grade then me, everyone assumes he's the smarter one, or it could happen vice-versa. Another example to this was that N was mocked by his friends when he was young after I won my first talent show back in elementary school, and being that his 'younger sister' looked better than him. A lot happened after that, but that's a story for another day.
Alright, then! I think that's enough for now!
I don't know if these are all the questions, but these are the most people have asked me.
Thank you for reading!