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It's Better This Way

My recount of my parents split and why I am okay with it.

By Kyleigh KeovilayPublished 6 years ago 3 min read
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For as long as I remember, my parents always bickered back and forth. For as long as I remember, my parents never kissed, hugged, or held hands. When my father tried to pull my mother close, she would push him away. When my mother tried to talk to my father, he was not receptive.

My parents never had one of those relationship that you wanted for yourself. To this day, I do not wish to be in a relationship like theirs. I love both of my parents separately, but it's better when they aren't together. My parents always where separated for periods of time. But never fully. My father would just stay in our finished basement, or on the couch. Then they would get back together and they would start the cycle over again

This time was different. In fact, I remember my mom telling me in the exact words, "I know we separate a lot, but this time is different." It was. There were whispered conversations, locked doors. Mom coming out pissed, dad coming out pissed. The environment was terrible. Dad's temper shortened. Mom's happiness shrunk. It happened gradually but fast at the same time. I saw this coming. To me it was no big deal. I hate to say it but it's better when they aren't together.

Mom's happy. Dad's happy. We are happy. There is a lot less fighting, and we do a lot more. I spend lots of time with dad and lots of times with mom. they don't have to be together to be happy. And that's why I am ok with it. We are all happy and out of the toxicity of the environment. That is one thing my sister doesn't get. My parents at the moment are legally separated this time. Dad moved out. Mom's moved on. She doesn't see the happiness my mom feels now. The fun she is having. The way she can go out and do things for herself rather than just being a wife. She doesn't see that my dad can now live the life he pleases. She still wishes they were together. Unlike her, I was never the child who wanted mommy and daddy back together. I still am not. The less fighting and tension the better and with them no together we can all live happy lives.

My mother doesn't get it either, but I truly was okay with the arrangement. The fact that now both my parents are living their lives the way they want and are happy, make me happy. The fact that there is 100 percent less fighting, makes me happy. I love my parents and I love my family, but it's better this way.

Was I upset at first? Yeah. No child wishes their parents marriage to get to that point, but I saw it coming. There really was no transition. I still see my father, though I primarily live with my mother. I don't feel loved any less. In fact, I feel loved 20x more. I am able to spend quality time with my father and siblings that I wasn't able to before. And I see my mom and do more things with her. In order to be happy I do not need both parents together. I need both parents content and happy. When they are both happy, I am. I do admit it isn't the perfect situation. It has its ups, and downs and its flaws but, that's life. I explain to my sister that the situation had nothing to do with us. The situation was bigger than us. We had to realize that. They are better apart than they where together. The environment is lighter. We may struggle at times but we always pull through, we have friends and family who help and understand. It's not ideal, but its the way things are and the way things are better. It's better this way.

divorced
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About the Creator

Kyleigh Keovilay

Ameature poet-photographer-minimalist

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